Saturday, December 17, 2011

count down..

It's Saturday and I had the last lecture in university today (yeah school on Saturday). But i survived it. And what matters the most, is that I am on holidays now! No university until the second week of January (i have 3 exams then). But after the exams i have two more weeks of holiday! And on February starts the internship! Oh boy, it'll be a crazy time! I really need to rest, to relax and enjoy the holiday season. I feel so stressed and so weak. Some nights tears just roll out of my eyes without a reason. I am just weak. And I miss Jay! I really need him here! But there's only one full day between us. I am going to Practice Night tomorrow and on Monday morning Jay comes home! I cannot wait!!!!!!!!!
Oh, i want snowy winter, but i am starting to loose my hope. It's only raining :/ I need something to brighten my days. I need Jay (like i already mentioned). But yeah, I gotta be strong. Like I used to be. lotLately i feel so weak. When i was teenager i had some hard times until i had to fight with it. So, i found my inner strenght. I never know i was so strong. And I changed. I was always very positive, i was strong, i was totally enjoying my life. And I do so right now too! But lately i have felt like i am loosing my strenght. Maybe it's just because I feel a bit alone and I miss Jay a lot! But he's always with me - in my heart. I really want to hug him, to talk to him, and hear how much i mean to him. Sometimes i need it. I need it a lot. I need to know that no matter what he's always supporting and protecting me. Oh, I miss him! Counting hours till Monday morning!
Love always!

S.B.




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